July 14,2019
I have done gender training with farmers and adults but with children, it’s much more interesting and fun. Chechis in Kerala used to ask so when are you going to do with our husbands.
We (Sethulakshmi Vinayan and I) discuss the difference in gender and sex, Patriarchy, effects of masculinity on boys and girls, gender disparity in institutions like home, religion, media, Child abuse, Puberty, adolescence, love, sexual harassment and laws.
On Love,
This is their (14- 16 years old) favourite session. Some of these kids’ parents don’t like boys and girls talking or sitting next to each other and even want to change schools because of this! And then, these kids are completely cute/dramatic when it comes to love. They say, Akka, Love is one of the greatest feelings. Love is such a sacred emotion. Love is an emotion and being in love is really fun.
Gender disparities in the classroom
Boys were enraged that teachers think that girls don’t copy and let three girls sit on a bench while only 2 boys sit on a bench. And, during tests, they pull up more boys than girls. Girls complained about how boys make fun of them and even if a boy comes and talks to them the fun of the guy who talks to girls. In the middle of this marathon discussion,in one of the classes, one 9th boy just stood up and very passionately said, “Akka, we have suppressed girls from a very young age and we have stopped them from coming up in life, let’s just acknowledge that”. after a moment of silence, his classmates started clapping while we were still confused. (Btw, this hero told us in his feedback that he is in love with a girl from his class and will wait until college)
They say a lot of funny and interesting things. While talking about movies and media, Girls were of the opinion why don’t heroines enter with a bang BGM in a bullet or why they don’t confess love first or why Father-in-law and son in law fight in serials and why they don’t show men splitting up families. In the middle of all this, one kid was super excited to become a dad that he yelled, “Yes”
While talking about home, they questioned why girls wake up early than boys, how they don’t get out at night. Although we discussed the taboo around periods at home, they still seemed not very bothered about it.
We use some form of forum theatre and ask them to depict common conflict in their life. They enacted a scene where a brother and sister ask permission to their father to go out. The usual response is no questions asked to the boy while the girl can’t go out. A kid who intervened to play the role as a father told the girl to be brave and take care of herself when she is out and told the boy to be careful too and come back on time. (This is a big deal!)
Finally, One of my most favourite sessions is when we use movie clips during our session kids would grumble when we bash Rajini and Vijay and by the end when they have to identify punishable crime, they go like “Akka, what Vijay said is wrong”.That’s when I feel like my life’s purpose has been fulfilled.
Thinnai 